Seasons

I always love the change of seasons. The cooler air of fall whisking away golden leaves before the bitter chill settles in. The tremulous new buds of spring bravely peeking out in hope of summer sun. There's something wonderful about the promises of a new season.

And when it comes to weather, I can look forward to what's coming.

In life, though, we have seasons where we are called to say goodbye. To put off the old. And I'm facing one of those seasons right now. For the past few years, I've performed with a community theater. I've met some great people who felt like lifelong friends. I've been given opportunities to shine on stage. But my time there has come to an end. Changes in leadership and the community itself have made me feel unwelcome. I would never have left on my own, so God intervened. Being there became so uncomfortable, I knew it was time to move on.

Beyond that, I feel like my time on stage has come to an end. A couple of nerve-wracking auditions resulting in bad or no parts has shown me that I'm in the wrong spot. So I am stepping back. I will focus my efforts elsewhere.

Writing has been the same way for me. I've long felt like a fraud in that arena. I never set out to be an author. I don't have formal training or education. But I had characters in my head who just wouldn't shut up until I told their stories. And when I finished telling Jameson Kendrick's story in Star Sailors, I was done. I haven't written anything creative since 2020. (Thanks, COVID, for sucking the life out of everything.) I still have lots of notes of things yet to be written, but I don't know if I will ever get back to that.

This week has reminded me of Antonio Salieri. I relate so well to his mini-monologue at the end of the movie Amadeus, with the exception of his contempt toward God at the beginning. I shall leave you with that...

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