Ashley Hodges Bazer - Author
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The Challenges of an Introvert

11/24/2014

1 Comment

 
I used to consider myself fairly outgoing. I didn't really seem to have trouble making friends or sparking up conversations with strangers. I had no problem standing up in front of a group of people and explaining something. I was an extrovert.

Until I stayed home for 8 years.

Something changed. I don't know if it was lack of interaction or a shift in circumstances, but my personality flipped.  I wasn't a total hermit (although there are days I'd like to be!), but as a stay-at-home mom, living on a pastor's budget in a small town, my face-to-face options were pretty limited. I focused more on expressing myself through writing. It seems like a natural occurrence.

I had times when my extroverted side revealed itself. I participated in community theatre and sang for various events around town. Nerves always showed up, but they were manageable. I loved the attention from the crowd or running into someone at the grocery store who said, "I didn't know you had a voice like that!" I know we're not supposed to revel in the praise of man, but it sure felt good to hear those things.

One day, though, I got tired of being nervous on the stage. I'd proved to myself that I could do it, but I was done. I didn't want to feel my knees quaking or see the microphone shaking. So I gave it up. I still love to sing, but I do it on my terms now. I can rock out and wail in my car all I want to. And my imagined fans adore me.

Every so often, though, I have to make presentations. I try to hearken back to those days when, as a stage manager, I would stand up before my cast full of eager actors and lay down the law. "You will be on time for rehearsals. And while I do make notes of all blocking, you are responsible to know yours." Stuff like that. But that confidence rarely comes back around. It slipped away when I wasn't looking! And...you guessed it...those nerves edge into my moment.

So how does an introvert survive?

For me, if I'm well-rested, facing these extroverted demands is much easier. It's also important for me to be prepared. I need to have notes in front of me, or I need to have studied beforehand. I wish there was an easy trick like they did in The Brady Bunch where you imagine the audience in their underwear, but that's never worked for me. The promise of a reward helps. After a recent speaking event, I treated myself to Starbucks.

I don't have the answers, but those are a few things that have worked for me. If you're an introvert, how do you get through extrovert-type events?
1 Comment
KJ Scrim link
11/24/2014 12:37:19 am

My story reads very much the same as your's. I am happy I can reflect back and know that if I did it before I can do it again. The world never imploded when I spoke in front of an audience in the past so why would it implode now? I also ask myself, "What's the worst that could happen?" I have already experienced the "worst case scenarios" so I'm good to go now.

Use all your past experiences, Ashley. They will support everything you do today and all the rest of the tomorrows. Oh, and a great sense of humor goes a long way too! :-)

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    Duchess Writer

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  • Home
  • Star Sailors
    • The Commodore >
      • Characters
    • The Princess >
      • Characters
    • The Skyjacker >
      • Characters
    • The Stowaway >
      • Characters
    • The Operative >
      • Characters
  • The Crown's Call
    • Heralds of the Crown >
      • Poison >
        • Characters
        • Deleted Scenes
      • Fusion >
        • Characters
        • Deleted Scene
      • Reconciled >
        • Characters
    • Rise of the Crown
    • Touch of the Crown >
      • Outlaw >
        • Characters
    • Champions of the Crown >
      • Asylum >
        • Characters
    • Fun Stuff >
      • The Timeline
      • The System
      • The Inhabitants >
        • Logia/Lumen/Ghosts
        • Strages/Crepusculum/Legacy
  • Time Spinners
    • In the Beginning >
      • Characters
  • Other Novels
    • Tinsel Pines Tales
    • Checkmate >
      • Characters
    • Once Upon a Heist >
      • Characters
      • Map of Paladia
      • Venefica's Curse
  • Bio
    • Frequently Asked Questions
    • Promo
    • Mamma Mia
  • Buy
  • Blog